Divorcing With Children: How To Help Them Cope

Are you in the middle of a divorce from your husband or wife? If the two of you have children together, you may have noticed that your children aren’t exactly taking the news very lightly. Some children might not comprehend the real reasons behind the divorce. Because you don’t want them to suffer during this sensitive time, there are a few things that you and your former partner can do to help the children cope.

Remain Civil and Create a Fair Schedule

There are many reasons why you may have decided divorce was the best option. Whether the two of you simply grew apart or if infidelity and other problems were involved, it’s still best to stay civil during the divorce. As much as you may want to scream at your former partner, sitting down and compromising will benefit the children.

Because it isn’t always easy to arrange a time to talk with someone who you no longer want to be with, especially if there is a lot of negative energy between the two of you, a divorce lawyer, can help with the process. You can discuss your custody expectations with the lawyer. For example, you might want to have your children on specific dates, including certain holidays. The divorce lawyer can prepare a mediation meeting where you and your partner will discuss custody terms and ultimately agree to something that is fair and benefits the children.

Have Your Children Write Their Feelings in a Journal

There are a lot of emotions that your children might be dealing with because their parents are now separating. If your children are having a difficult time communicating with you about how they’re feeling, you can supply each child with a journal, asking them to write their feelings down when they want to.

Not only does keeping a journal allow your children to express themselves, it gives you a chance to find out what is bothering them the most about the divorce. If you find out what they’re feeling, you’ll have a better chance at comforting them.

Read Books on Divorce to Young Children

While divorce is difficult for anyone, young children may have the most trouble understanding why one of their parents is moving out and won’t be around all the time like they once were. If your children are under the age of 10, there are dozens of good books that you can read to them about divorce. Your children may easily relate to the characters in these books and feel a bit better knowing that they’re not the only ones with divorced parents.

Keep Your Children Occupied

You shouldn’t ignore talking about divorce to your children because you do want them to understand what is going on, but their lives shouldn’t have to revolve around it. Keeping your children occupied with fun activities, such as visits to local attractions and craft projects at home, will not only distract them from constantly thinking about the divorce, but will also give you more quality time to spend with them.

Getting divorced when you have children is rough for everyone, but there are ways to finalize it without causing too much stress on the children. The options above may help your children understand that the divorce isn’t their fault. Even though it will be a challenge for them at first, offering your support to them can make matters better. For more information, contact an experienced lawyer from a law firm like Kelm & Reuter, P.A.

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